Phone rings.....
Me: Yeah
D: Busy?
Me: Not really...
D: Listen, there is a new Italian Restaurant in town
Me: *Grins* Where? Where?
D: *reads out some excerpts about asparagus and fondue**
Me: Ooooooooooooh *Droooooooooool* .....so when are we going?
D: Oh that? An average meal for two costs &*^% so....
Me: So? *Raises an eyebrow*
D: Never........
Me: "Why then did u call me Buster?"
D: ***Evil Grin and high pitched laugh***
Lazy day...stupid post.....Wish I could be at home....
Friday, August 24, 2007
Monday, August 06, 2007
Anger....
Yesterday, I was skimming through a magazine and read an article on how to control your anger. The author rightly said, anger is like fire, it burns the source faster than the target. The author went on to say that you should forgive the person who has hurt you and maybe write a forgiveness letter. If you are not up to posting it, just burn it. Once done, you will see your anger melt away.
I wonder if it is that simple?
I have always had those internal conversations about my anger. I always end up telling myself, I am not an angel to forgive and forget. I am, but a human being who has been hit where it hurts the most. I believe if you cannot forget the wrong doing you can never never forgive the person who wronged.
I can never forget the tears that used to well up in my eyes during the days which were supposed to be the happiest in my whole life. I was so full of happiness having got what I wanted the most. All the happiness was washed away in the tears that I shed. I still wonder what I had done to prompt people to do what they did. Everything came as a rude shock and killed my self-confidence and my self-respect, the two things I valued most in all my life. How can I ever forgive them? How can I ever forget those days, when I cried unendingly for no fault of mine? How can I ever forget the fact that it took me years to rebuild what I had lost? More so, a part of it which is gone for ever?
In hindsight, everything worked out as I had planned. There was no reason for them to hurt me the way they did. I was blessed with all that I yearned for. Except for those days, hours and minutes that I cried and did not smile at my happiness, I haven't lost much. Anger of course has burnt me from inside, but as far as I am concerned, it has only burnt the immense respect I had for them. On a positive note, I did gain a lot. I discovered the immense potential I had hitherto unknown to me. Now. I know, I can come out of any number of rough periods unscathed.
Madame Dorothée Deluzy "It is easier to forgive an enemy than a friend"
I wonder if it is that simple?
I have always had those internal conversations about my anger. I always end up telling myself, I am not an angel to forgive and forget. I am, but a human being who has been hit where it hurts the most. I believe if you cannot forget the wrong doing you can never never forgive the person who wronged.
I can never forget the tears that used to well up in my eyes during the days which were supposed to be the happiest in my whole life. I was so full of happiness having got what I wanted the most. All the happiness was washed away in the tears that I shed. I still wonder what I had done to prompt people to do what they did. Everything came as a rude shock and killed my self-confidence and my self-respect, the two things I valued most in all my life. How can I ever forgive them? How can I ever forget those days, when I cried unendingly for no fault of mine? How can I ever forget the fact that it took me years to rebuild what I had lost? More so, a part of it which is gone for ever?
In hindsight, everything worked out as I had planned. There was no reason for them to hurt me the way they did. I was blessed with all that I yearned for. Except for those days, hours and minutes that I cried and did not smile at my happiness, I haven't lost much. Anger of course has burnt me from inside, but as far as I am concerned, it has only burnt the immense respect I had for them. On a positive note, I did gain a lot. I discovered the immense potential I had hitherto unknown to me. Now. I know, I can come out of any number of rough periods unscathed.
Madame Dorothée Deluzy "It is easier to forgive an enemy than a friend"
Friday, August 03, 2007
Poem....
This is dedicated to my "eyes", without whom I am blind...
This is for the two strings that tug at my heart......
This is for the two people because of whom I feel alive, loved and wanted....
This is for them who make my life worth living......
You're the first thing I think of ,as
I rise to start my day.
Morning thoughts of you
bring a soft smile to my
face, with joy and happiness to
stay within my heart throughout my day.
It's you that gives me a sense of belonging
and the feeling of being loved and wanted ,as
my heart overflows with my love for you.
I hold each thought of you close to my heart
and every dream we share
is captured in my very soul.
Your love brings
fulfillment and contentment to me.
I start each day whispering to you.
Wherever you may go today, my love
whatever you may do
if you stop and think of me know that
I'm thinking of you too because,
I love you so.
This is for the two strings that tug at my heart......
This is for the two people because of whom I feel alive, loved and wanted....
This is for them who make my life worth living......
Each New Day .......
At the beginning of each new day
you walk into my mind.
At the beginning of each new day
you walk into my mind.
You're the first thing I think of ,as
I rise to start my day.
Morning thoughts of you
bring a soft smile to my
face, with joy and happiness to
stay within my heart throughout my day.
It's you that gives me a sense of belonging
and the feeling of being loved and wanted ,as
my heart overflows with my love for you.
I hold each thought of you close to my heart
and every dream we share
is captured in my very soul.
Your love brings
fulfillment and contentment to me.
I start each day whispering to you.
Wherever you may go today, my love
whatever you may do
if you stop and think of me know that
I'm thinking of you too because,
I love you so.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Friday, July 06, 2007
Wish List.....
My wish list....
1. A small vacation to anywhere
2. A little peace and quite
3. A nice book to read
4. A huge glass of cold watermelon juice on the side
5. Uninterupted 10 hrs sleep
6. Lots of playtime with my kiddo
Is it a lot to ask for? I don't think so...after slogging for seven full years I deserve this much at least...
I think all I actually need is a show down with a few people.
Then I can get on with my life.....the way I want to......
1. A small vacation to anywhere
2. A little peace and quite
3. A nice book to read
4. A huge glass of cold watermelon juice on the side
5. Uninterupted 10 hrs sleep
6. Lots of playtime with my kiddo
Is it a lot to ask for? I don't think so...after slogging for seven full years I deserve this much at least...
I think all I actually need is a show down with a few people.
Then I can get on with my life.....the way I want to......
Thursday, June 21, 2007
7 years ago.....
I read a blog today about guys at the fag end of their college days. A lot of emotions expressed in a lot of beautiful words.
That got me thinking about my own last few college days. I wondered what it felt like 7 years ago. What it felt like to know life will never be the same again.....I hardly remember a thing. I can hardly recollect a single one of those days. I can hardly remember that last day when I saw my pals of four years in the college that one last time. I am sure I would have wanted to hug my closest friends....shed a tear or two....I am sure of that.....but I hardly remember anything that went on....it is as though everything has been wiped out of the memory.....
Now, I wonder why? Why was it that I chose to (or just plain) forget everything?
Was it:
I will never know.....for it has been 7 long years....so much has happened within the short period of 7 years..its hard to remember anything at all....
I also wonder, if I never wanted to remember anything at all..........was my memory loss intentional?
That got me thinking about my own last few college days. I wondered what it felt like 7 years ago. What it felt like to know life will never be the same again.....I hardly remember a thing. I can hardly recollect a single one of those days. I can hardly remember that last day when I saw my pals of four years in the college that one last time. I am sure I would have wanted to hug my closest friends....shed a tear or two....I am sure of that.....but I hardly remember anything that went on....it is as though everything has been wiped out of the memory.....
Now, I wonder why? Why was it that I chose to (or just plain) forget everything?
Was it:
- a kind of numbness?
- a kind of forced acceptance....
- a rude shock?
- the hope that things would be better now...
- the bold facade posing to the new life ahead of me?
- the anticipation of sweeter things to come?
- the maturity as I was stepping into another phase of my life too?
- the scary feeling of having to enter two phases of life at once?
- because of the rant and rave going on within?
- because I had met the man of my life?
- or just plain confusion?
I will never know.....for it has been 7 long years....so much has happened within the short period of 7 years..its hard to remember anything at all....
I also wonder, if I never wanted to remember anything at all..........was my memory loss intentional?
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
The daughter I will never have.....
Once I start, I cannot resist :-)
Ain't he (or she?) cute....
Can anyone believe its a boy and not a girl :-)
My Baby....
Look at my baby....
My bundle of joy.....
The light of my life.....
My Son....
My SUN....
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
Moving.........
End of a chapter...
Start of another....
Transition is painful....
The unbeleiving looks...
Looks of disappointment...
The taunts...
The anger......
The I-don't-recognize-you look.......
The how-can-anyone-be-so-stupid look..........
Life moves on.........for good or for the worst.....and so I move on...........for better or the worse.....
Start of another....
Transition is painful....
The unbeleiving looks...
Looks of disappointment...
The taunts...
The anger......
The I-don't-recognize-you look.......
The how-can-anyone-be-so-stupid look..........
Life moves on.........for good or for the worst.....and so I move on...........for better or the worse.....
Monday, May 07, 2007
Happy!!! Yippppey!
When you are sad..you are blue...
When you are envious.....you are green.... (Yeah Green ;-))
When you are angry....you are red....
Will someone tell me what colour you are when you are happy?
Truly happy....for someone very special....for their very special time in life.....
How can I express my own happiness? With a big hug? Here you go.......
Every piece of the puzzle called life falls into place.......in time......
God, Congratulations my dearest!!!!
When you are envious.....you are green.... (Yeah Green ;-))
When you are angry....you are red....
Will someone tell me what colour you are when you are happy?
Truly happy....for someone very special....for their very special time in life.....
How can I express my own happiness? With a big hug? Here you go.......
Every piece of the puzzle called life falls into place.......in time......
God, Congratulations my dearest!!!!
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
A very good write up....."Star vs Star"
I found this very thought provoking write up in one of the forwards I happened to read....
Star versus 'Star'
On Tuesday a news swept across all the news channels 'Sanjay Datt relieved by the court'. 'Sirf Munna Not a bhai' '13 saal ka vanvaas khatam' 'alhough found guilty for possession of armory, Sanjay can breath sigh of relief as all the TADA charges against him are withdrawn' And then many experts like Salman khan saying 'He is a good person. We knew he will come out clean' Mr. Big B 'Datt family and our family have relations for years he's a good kid. He is like elder brother to abhishek'. His sister priya Datt 'we can sleep well tonight?it's a great relief'
In other news, Parliament was mad at Indian team for performing bad; Greg chapel said something ?..; Bomb scare in gorakhpoor express; and Shah Rukh Khan replaces Big B in KBC and Sonia asked PM to consider reducing petroleum prices (I wonder who's the PM ?anyways that is not the topic so leave it?) But most of the emphasis was given on Sanjay Datt's "phoenix like" comeback from the ashes of terrorist charges.
Surfing through the channels, one news on BBC startled me, it read, Hisbul Mujahidin's Most wanted terrorist 'Sohel Faisal' killed in anantnag, India. Indian Major leading the operation lost his life in the process. Four others are injured.
It was past midnight, I started visiting the Indian channels, the ones who are 'Sabse TEZ', but Sanjubaba was still ruling. They were telling How Sanjubaba pleaded to the court saying 'I am the sole bread earner for my family' 'I have a daughter who is studying in US who will look after her'. And then they showed how sanjubaba was not wearing his lucky blue shirt while he was hearing the verdict. Also how he went to every temple and prayed for last some months. A suspect in Mumbai bomb blasts, convicted under armory act?..was being made into a hero.
Major Manish H Pitambare got the information from his sources about the terrorists' whereabouts. Wasting no time he attacked the camp killed the Hisbul mujahidin's suprimo and in the process lost his life?..To the bullets fired from an AK47?? He has a wife and a daughter (just like sanjubaba), age ?..18 months.
Major Manish never said 'I have a daughter' ?before he took the decision to attack the terrorist hide out in the darkest of nights?He never thought about having a family and he being the bread earner.
No news channel covered this since they were too busy hyping a former drug addict, an actor in real and reel life, a suspect who's linked to bomb blasts which killed hundreds. Their aim was to show how he defied the TADA charges and they were so successful that his conviction in possession of armory had no meaning. They also concluded that his parents in heaven must be happy and proud of him??
Parents of Major Pitambare are still on this earth and they have to live rest of their lives without their beloved son. His daughter won't ever see her papa again.Definition of a Star has changed Major? it really has. So sanjubaba always has a gun in every one of his movies then in real life if he has an AK47 then what's the big deal we are used to see him with some ammunition without it he's just a 49yr old hero so he did it for us?..so that we feel normal;
Even if one of the bullets from one of such AK47's took a Real Star's life ??
but sir bole toh ?.. tension nahi leneka. Aapun ko thoda bura laga. Apun pure din aapke baarein mein socha. Sach bataun kya aapun dukhi matlab ki senty ho gaya isliye ye likha.
Sorry major, to my generation there is no greater hero than one who laid his life in the name of this great nation. Hence Sir, I salute you. You are the real Star, Vande mataram.
Star versus 'Star'
On Tuesday a news swept across all the news channels 'Sanjay Datt relieved by the court'. 'Sirf Munna Not a bhai' '13 saal ka vanvaas khatam' 'alhough found guilty for possession of armory, Sanjay can breath sigh of relief as all the TADA charges against him are withdrawn' And then many experts like Salman khan saying 'He is a good person. We knew he will come out clean' Mr. Big B 'Datt family and our family have relations for years he's a good kid. He is like elder brother to abhishek'. His sister priya Datt 'we can sleep well tonight?it's a great relief'
In other news, Parliament was mad at Indian team for performing bad; Greg chapel said something ?..; Bomb scare in gorakhpoor express; and Shah Rukh Khan replaces Big B in KBC and Sonia asked PM to consider reducing petroleum prices (I wonder who's the PM ?anyways that is not the topic so leave it?) But most of the emphasis was given on Sanjay Datt's "phoenix like" comeback from the ashes of terrorist charges.
Surfing through the channels, one news on BBC startled me, it read, Hisbul Mujahidin's Most wanted terrorist 'Sohel Faisal' killed in anantnag, India. Indian Major leading the operation lost his life in the process. Four others are injured.
It was past midnight, I started visiting the Indian channels, the ones who are 'Sabse TEZ', but Sanjubaba was still ruling. They were telling How Sanjubaba pleaded to the court saying 'I am the sole bread earner for my family' 'I have a daughter who is studying in US who will look after her'. And then they showed how sanjubaba was not wearing his lucky blue shirt while he was hearing the verdict. Also how he went to every temple and prayed for last some months. A suspect in Mumbai bomb blasts, convicted under armory act?..was being made into a hero.
Major Manish H Pitambare got the information from his sources about the terrorists' whereabouts. Wasting no time he attacked the camp killed the Hisbul mujahidin's suprimo and in the process lost his life?..To the bullets fired from an AK47?? He has a wife and a daughter (just like sanjubaba), age ?..18 months.
Major Manish never said 'I have a daughter' ?before he took the decision to attack the terrorist hide out in the darkest of nights?He never thought about having a family and he being the bread earner.
No news channel covered this since they were too busy hyping a former drug addict, an actor in real and reel life, a suspect who's linked to bomb blasts which killed hundreds. Their aim was to show how he defied the TADA charges and they were so successful that his conviction in possession of armory had no meaning. They also concluded that his parents in heaven must be happy and proud of him??
Parents of Major Pitambare are still on this earth and they have to live rest of their lives without their beloved son. His daughter won't ever see her papa again.Definition of a Star has changed Major? it really has. So sanjubaba always has a gun in every one of his movies then in real life if he has an AK47 then what's the big deal we are used to see him with some ammunition without it he's just a 49yr old hero so he did it for us?..so that we feel normal;
Even if one of the bullets from one of such AK47's took a Real Star's life ??
but sir bole toh ?.. tension nahi leneka. Aapun ko thoda bura laga. Apun pure din aapke baarein mein socha. Sach bataun kya aapun dukhi matlab ki senty ho gaya isliye ye likha.
Sorry major, to my generation there is no greater hero than one who laid his life in the name of this great nation. Hence Sir, I salute you. You are the real Star, Vande mataram.
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
A good snipet........
A good snippet I read in Gone with the Wind.....
"Ellen O’Hara was different, and Scarlett regarded her as something holy and apart from all the rest of humankind. When Scarlett was a child, she had confused her mother with the Virgin Mary, and now that she was older she saw no reason for changing her opinion. To her, Ellen represented the utter security that only Heaven or a mother can give. She knew that her mother was the embodiment of justice, truth, loving tenderness and profound wisdom—a great lady."
Mothers......they are indispensible aren't they?
"Ellen O’Hara was different, and Scarlett regarded her as something holy and apart from all the rest of humankind. When Scarlett was a child, she had confused her mother with the Virgin Mary, and now that she was older she saw no reason for changing her opinion. To her, Ellen represented the utter security that only Heaven or a mother can give. She knew that her mother was the embodiment of justice, truth, loving tenderness and profound wisdom—a great lady."
Mothers......they are indispensible aren't they?
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