First Paycheck

Imagine working hard for years, when you don't get any paychecks. All that keeps you going is your sheer love for the work your are doing, the way you fall in love with the sculpture you are sculpting. You give all of your heart and soul to that one sculpture. You pour your love and tears and talent into that one sculpture, right from when its a crude stone, when there is no shape or contour to the stone....when you have no idea how it will turn out once you are done with it. I bow down to the power of love, the power of belief that your sculpture is going to be beautiful.

When you can unconditionally love your crude stone, even before it becomes a sculpture, how deep is this love. What a miracle..what a magic this love is. I don't believe you will love your sculpture more than your stone....since you have started off with all you have, all the love you can ever summon from inside, what more can you gather?

I am in a phase, now, when I am seeing the rough outline of my "stone". My crude is turning slowly turning into the idol I dreamt of. Its not done yet, not even half way through and I see my dreams materializing. I see my hard work paying off. I know there is a lot more do, lot more times I have to hit the stone with hard, soft strokes and chip a few rough edges, but at this vantage point, it looks awesome. It shows the tidings of all the good things to come.

The sacrifices I made, the sleepless nights, the despair, the bog-me-downs, every bit of it seems worth it. The stone did not ask me to do all this, the only thing that made me do it was the sheer potential of the stone, to be turned into a beautiful sculpture. I was not born with the skills, to be a sculpture, I learnt it. I was not an expert and still am not....but it made me give my best...made me learn, made me responsible, made me want to do it.

I thank the sculptures who made me what I am today and my idol for bringing out the best in me.

Thank God.....I have what I have. Thank God I did not take any wrong turns while getting here.